This is my Confession

Ive been for many many years had suicidal thoughts. Have I shared these to anyone...Absolutely not!!
Kept them to myself. I cant imagine what my brother went through. He probably was thinking like this article I found. I also been thinking like this :

To The Person Who Feels Suicidal <-------- font="" link="" nbsp="" site="" the="" to="">
good explanation to everything. I recomend you to read it if you feel like this. 

Weird thing is the day something tragic like this happens, thats when people suddenly appears and cares. But where were you before that?? Im talking about family mostly. Since I got no IRL friends.
hypocrites? maybe. Just strange I think. After this has settle down, will they go back and not keep in touch. Probably 100 % sure. Maybe you are good without me too...